MMM, love me some humble pie.

27 Jul

Have you ever searched for a church home?  Have you ever played the visiting game? Been the couple to walk in the door and not know anyone?

I never had, until now.

I grew up for 18 years in the same church.  Started dating my husband, and joined his church for 10 years.  Then, at the end of February this year, the Lord called us out.

First of all, let me start the admitting right here.  I actually really viewed church as a permanent home environment up until this last year.  We felt God calling us out of our church for a long time and actually dismissed Him as if we were hearing from Satan instead.  It just seems like you make a family, and leaving can feel like divorce.  Tough people stick through and work through everything, weak people leave.

Certainly, there has always been the exceptions in my mind for life changes.  Marriage, moving, and job relocation have always been obvious signs that you have valid reason to switch churches.  But other than that… I’d question if you were really hearing from the Lord, or if you are just a church hopper because you can’t hang through the tough stuff and changing seasons of life.

Wow did God shove a humble pie down my throat. (Notice I did not say a slice, I ate the whole pie… all 8 pieces in embarrassment.)

When we were certain the Lord was calling us to leave our church home, we had more questions, reservations, and concerns than answers.  In the last 5 months, more of what God is doing in our lives and why He called us out is being revealed to us, and it is SO EXCITING!!!! But the first three months didn’t feel joyful.

I cried a lot.  I missed my family. I longed to walk into “home” and hear people call us by name, hug us, interact with our children, respect us, and for us to all know where to go.

Visiting churches at first felt like TORTURE! I felt like I was repetitively praying and saying ” Why God?! This process is absolutely horrible.  Why would you have us do this? WHERE do you want us to go?  We want to be plugged in, not feel like outcasts!”

And then the Lord spoke through my husband right to my heart.

This season for us is full of an enormous amount of teaching to prepare us for what is to come.

We have learned lessons we would have never otherwise known or been exposed to without this season.  And I’m grateful not only for the help it will be to our future, but for the chance to eat more, you guessed it, humble pie, as I am realizing my own strengths and weaknesses total failures in church life.

Here are some realities of things we’ve learned by stepping into different buildings on Saturday or Sunday mornings and….

~talking to different welcoming committees or lack of

~shaking hands with members or being completely ignored

~ being invited to studies or being treated as if we probably don’t even own Bibles

~watching the kids be excited about class or afraid to enter and why that is

~meeting Pastors who remember our  names and those who say “oh yeah, I saw you out there” but never came up to say anything to us

~ worship teams full of the spirit and those that are not

~a body of believers who are ready to serve and those who stick to their groups in their comfort level

~sunday school classes with depth and those that are so immature I question the relevance at all

I’m not going to lie.  It is still hard, even knowing there is a reason and incredible lessons being learned here.  I still desire a home and a family again.  But my heart has been woken up to the purpose of this season with new excitement that nothing is being wasted in this journey. And I can’t wait for what God has in store for us!

And just to make the most of this- would you comment and share with me something you learned, noticed, loved, hated, or hoped for during a season in your life where you were looking for a church home?  I’d really like to hear from you!!!


2 Responses to “MMM, love me some humble pie.”

  1. Valerie July 27, 2012 at 9:48 am #

    I was dragging my feet for a long time and refusing to leave the church I attended for 24 years. God was leading me to submit to my husband…and I was telling him no. Over and over. Through various avenues (every topic, everywhere) God impressed on me the importance of submitting to my husband (until I GOT IT!) So I told him we’d go to his church. ANd inside I was throwing a temper tantrum, but when we went that first Sunday, I felt as welcomed as I had at my “home” church, and then the craziest thing happened. My husband came fully back to the Lord and started to lead our family towards each other, and towards Christ. A-ma-zing! I was being fed like I never have been ever before and my kids were so happy, and had the support and encouragement of some amazing people. My husband is still crediting his return to the act of submission God laid on my heart. Hardest thing I’ve ever done? By far! But I too ate the whooole pie, and I have to say it was delicious! I’ll be praying for you through this season.

    • kaylagulick July 27, 2012 at 10:55 am #

      Wow Valerie! That is AWESOME!!! And that makes me so excited for you, Jimmy, and the kids! Thank you for sharing your story and ecouragement. I hope to update in the future with all the details about how delicious this pie really was to eat, once I was willing to swallow my pride and try some : )

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