Who is the MOST beautiful?

28 Aug

Are you pretty?

I’m serious.

Do you think you’re pretty? Do you think you could be more pretty? Less pretty?  Do you think anyone else thinks you’re pretty?

Every woman has a desire to feel pretty.  Some women are totally controlled by that desire to feel pretty.  Literally, if their husband told them every single day they are the most beautiful woman in the world… it wouldn’t be enough.  They still want every other man on the planet to think they were the most beautiful person or by some chance, it just might not be true or their own husband might be lying.

I’ll share a quick story about how this really plays out constantly in our lives.  One day while out shopping (you know, the thing we ladies all LOVE to do, except when it comes to trying stuff on and then we feel like a disgusting train wreck which leads to the dreaded fight in our mind between only eating vegetables for the rest of our lives or heading to the local dairy bar for a snickers blizzard) my friend and I were walking into a store talking about how it is so frustrating that some women are just so stinking beautiful. And we look up, and there is a GORGEOUS girl. And we both were like “we hate her.”  We laughed really hard.  We didn’t mean it.  We didn’t really hate her.  But, under that laughter was a deep inner envy that no matter what I do externally, I will never look like “her.”

I was thinking about this earlier today. Ponder if you will, what did Eve look like?  Genesis doesn’t give us much on Adam and Eve beyond creation and the fall (which for me could be WAY more descriptive than it actually is.) We just don’t get to hear and see the inside out of every day life.  I wish Eve had a blog. I’d love to read her daily journal! And Adam’s too for that matter.

I wonder what the very first woman God created looked like.  Was she tall or short? What shade of brown was her skin?  Did she have long, short or medium length hair?  What color was it?  Did it have natural highlights? Did she have wrinkles or ‘laugh lines’? Did she have dimples?  Did she have acne? What type of muscle mass did she have?  How much did she weigh?  What “size” of clothes would she have worn?

Would any of that have mattered at all?  I mean, if there were no other women to compare herself to, would she have just automatically felt beautiful?  In fact, her first three children were boys, so she had at least a few years to have all the female attention she could ever possibly want.  No wandering male eyes and no billboards of ridiculously gorgeous (air-brushed) women plastered for her to compare herself against.

Then again, maybe she struggled every day thinking if Adam had been given his choice of design, she would have actually looked a little different.

We know that when they first saw each other they were naked and felt no shame. But that was before Eve started having conversations with Satan.  The master of all things evil including but never limited to doubt, deception and dissatisfaction.

The race for beauty is never-ending. And no one will ever win it.  For every pretty woman out there, someone is “prettier”, at least to someone else. The culture we live in has proved this for us.  Remember when size 14 was the staple of perfection?  And now it’s a size 0?  Or how the colors of eye shadow change from blues, to purples, to browns, to “the smokey eye.”  And you can do absolutely anything imaginable to hair at a salon from dying it any color on the planet to making it permanently curly, straight, or add feathers and extensions.

Think of two pretty women you know right now.  Do they look like twins? Is one taller or shorter?  Does one have blonde hair and the other black? Does one wear a 10 and the other a 2?  And yet, (I’m assuming there are differences) you think they are both beautiful?  Hmmm… that really puts a twist on this race for beauty doesn’t it?  What ‘one look’ really is the most pretty?  Do you know? Cause honestly, I don’t.

Feeling beautiful brings confidence to ourselves and pleasure to our husbands.  But the race for beauty is a trap that ultimately makes it impossible for us to settle in and accept the confidence and pleasure it brings.  Instead when we run the race, we feel defeated, insignificant, dissatisfied, and disbelieving of our husband’s compliments ultimately disrespecting and taking away from their enjoyment of us.

Scripture says “3 Your adornment must not be merely external—braiding the hair, and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses; 4 but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God.” (I Peter 3:3-4)

I believe this translates to us that if we are chasing or running the race for merely external beauty, we’ll miss the inner beauty that is precious in God’s sight.  The God who fills us completely and is the author of beauty.  The God who grants confidence and pleasure to His children walking in obedience. The God whom we should have no other idols (like external beauty) before.  Yes, that is right.  The chase for external beauty can be our god.

We all know this to be true.  We should care more about our inner beauty than external beauty.  But just because we know truth doesn’t mean it automatically becomes easy to live out.  This is where prayer and petition of the Holy Spirit’s help really comes into play. And the power given to us to take our thoughts captive.  Grace, in the form God grants in our real lives.

Practical Application:

Ask myself the tough questions that no one wants to answer after reading this post.

Am I chasing external beauty? Am I ever satisfied with myself?  Do I believe my husband when he says I’m beautiful or do I constantly refute his compliments?  Do I ever leave the house before feeling like I “put myself together”?  If so, who am I trying to get to notice?  If a guy actually did notice, would that make me truly feel beautiful or honorable?

Pray and ask God to show me how to use the power of the Holy Spirit inside me. Discipline myself to take my thoughts captive and refuse to run the race for external beauty, even in my mind.

Start saying thank you for the compliments my husband gives and enjoy the confidence it can bring.  Especially in the enjoyment of each other.

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