The Dark.

11 Nov

I’m extremely afraid of the dark.  Always have been.  Always will be.

Tonight I had to go to church alone, which is 35-40 minutes away from home and then stop at Walmart for a couple quick things between the hours of 5:00 – 8:00.  Which means… it was dark. And I was alone.  Somehow, even driving down the road in my car, I can have anxiety about that.

The terrible “What If” game starts racing through my mind.

What if I get a flat tire?

What if I stop at a red light and someone busts open my window and hurts me?

What if someone is in the back seat?

It sounds so ridiculous when I’m sitting in my home  safe and sound, with my hubby in the chair, and the lights on…. but when I’m alone in the dark…. it’s scary. End of story.

While I was driving tonight, I was worshipping at the top of my lungs (because I can do that when no one else is in the car) and I was having such communion with the Lord that I had to keep forcing my hands back on the steering wheel instead of raising them in worship.

And the Lord started speaking to me about the dark.

Do you know why the dark is SO scary?  Because without light, you can’t see anything.  And without sight, you’re powerless to defend yourself.

The same is true in our spiritual lives.  Dark spots in our hearts are EXTREMELY scary.  And we may not even realize it.

When we have a hidden sin, we’re powerless.  The Light (Jesus) isn’t there (in the dark area of our heart that we haven’t released to Him) and we’re powerless to Satan, who lives in the darkness.

So I started thinking….

Do I have any dark places in my heart that I haven’t let anyone see?

For some reason tonight – I didn’t feel like the Lord was speaking to me just for me.  I think He wanted me to type this.  So I am. Maybe for you too?

Practical Application –

Find someone to tell my dark spots to and GET THEM EXPOSED!

(It won’t work to tell someone who doesn’t recognize the dark from the light.  Someone who is spiritually blind is not going to expose my darkness and help me name it and rid it from my life. It has to be someone who I’m “afraid” to tell because they won’t let me keep it.)

Get the power back from Satan and walk out life in honesty instead of in hiding.


6 Responses to “The Dark.”

  1. peacefulwife November 11, 2012 at 9:29 pm #

    I LOVE LOVE LOVE THIS! What a great post. I love your comparison between physical darkness and spiritual darkness. And I am so glad you mentioned to confess the darkness to someone who can tell the difference between darkness and light. This is such a life giving post. THANK YOU!

    • Kayla Gulick November 11, 2012 at 10:26 pm #

      You’re welcome. Telling someone is SO hard to do… especially to face the pride and/or embarrassment. But honestly, the freedom that comes is WELL worth the short term suffering!

  2. theresamylittleworld November 11, 2012 at 9:41 pm #

    Awesome thoughts. “Because without light you can’t see anything.” So simple but so profound. Also, I know what you mean about the dark. I always have a night light…and when hubby is on night shift, the big bright hall light may or may not be on! 😉

    • Kayla Gulick November 11, 2012 at 10:24 pm #

      I’m so glad to hear about your night-light. It makes me feel a little better!! : )
      Thanks for relating with me. I really appreciate it!!

  3. RaZella November 15, 2012 at 5:33 pm #

    This is so TRUE! I have always been afraid of the dark as well, and I’m sure, I will always never ever like it. I loved the comparison you made back to the heart and the dark spots on our hearts. I know I have been guilty in the past of “exposing” my dark spot to someone who didn’t know the difference between dark/light, and what a mistake that is! Praise God for His grace, and praise Him for his forgiveness when we find our dark spots, confess them, and repent of them at the cross of Jesus.
    Thank you for sharing. 🙂

    • Kayla Gulick November 15, 2012 at 6:08 pm #

      Absolutely! Thanks for sharing honestly! I wish we didn’t all struggle, but I’m so glad we can all relate : )

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