Valentines = RESPECT not love???

19 Jan

Hey Ladies (Girls Only this time guys… sorry : )

Through out the last 6 months I’ve learned that men appreciate being loved – but they thrive on being respected.  I know we as women thoroughly enjoy all the romantic and gushy present and gifts, but instead of giving what we like to get – or even just a tool or tickets to a game like we normally gift – let’s REALLY blow their socks off this year with a TOTALLY FREE present that will light them on fire (and no, I’m not just talking about sex – but do that too : )

**Even if you don’t normally celebrate Valentine’s Day (because we don’t) this is STILL the perfect time to do this!!!!

I’m asking you to join me this year in a Valentine’s Challenge/Present.

Starting THIS MONDAY January 21st let’s put together a “25 Reasons I respect you” present.

There are a number of ways you can participate.

Here are some ideas:

1.) Starting Monday – leave a note in his lunch/in the bathroom/in his vehicle one per day (25th day will be Feb 14th V-day) that says “I Respect You Because…..”

Optional- Also write them down in another location and put them together in a book to give him on Valentines Day. Your book can include printed out pictures of him working, being with you, playing with the kids etc… or can just be words!

2.) Start Monday and work on your list, but don’t let on what you’re doing.  Then buy a picture frame and print your 25 reasons out and frame them.

3.) Start Monday and give him a gift each day with a note that says why you Respect him.  This can be SUPER cheap or expensive depending on that you want to spend.

Example: Buy a bottle of Mt. Dew and attach a tag that says “I respect you because no one else at work can DEW what you do!”

Or a snickers Candy bar and say “I respect you because no one can make me SNICKER like you can.  You’re SO funny!”

Get on Pinterest – there are SO many ideas out there!

4.) Start Monday and pick something your husband loves (especially something you’ve never maybe taken interest in before) and make a play-on-words respect list of 25 things from that.   You can tell him one each day – or put it together and give it to him Feb 14th.

Example – Tools.  Tape Measure – I respect you because no one measures up to you. Then, continue with Hammer – Saw – Wrench – etc.

Or football – I respect you because you take life’s “tackles” and get back up with such confidence to keep leading our family.

Nascar – Basketball – Golf – Poker


WHAT you do is not going to be the important part.  The important part is that you use the word RESPECT and NOT THE WORD LOVE!!  He knows you love him.  And you tell him that daily.  What he isn’t always confident of is if you respect him as a man.  So tell him you do!  Just like if he made you a list of 25 things he loves about you would light your heart on fire…. this will nourish his soul in the same way!

**** You do NOT have to do this for your husband only.  This is a FANTASTIC present for your Son, Father or Grandpa too!!!!!!!

How about it?  Are you up for the challenge?

Practical Application:

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE comment below any other ideas or suggestions you have.  Also – tell me what you’ve “picked” to do and some ideas you’re using.  Especially if you pick something like Football or Golf because other women who have never taken an interest in those things could REALLY benefit from your  ideas too!


You have my full permission to share this with anyone you want – reblog it – pin it on pinterest – email it – Share it on Facebook

Let’s light up our men’s life this year, and in the mean time – remind ourselves of all the things we respect about them too!!



15 Responses to “Valentines = RESPECT not love???”

  1. peacefulwife January 19, 2013 at 8:17 pm #

    I love this idea! You can also interchange the word “respect” with “admire” or “I’m proud of you because” “I believe in you because.” “I have faith in you because.” FANTASTIC IDEAS, Kayla! THANK YOU!

    • Kayla Gulick January 19, 2013 at 8:26 pm #

      GREAT extra phrases April!! Thank you for sharing them with us!

  2. Clarice Wyman January 19, 2013 at 8:38 pm #

    Fabu idea. I’m in. We’re having many issues in our marriage because he does not feel respected, and I have not been good at showing it. So I’m eternally grateful to have this to go forward with 🙂

    • Kayla Gulick January 19, 2013 at 8:52 pm #

      Awesome Clarice! So excited to have you on board!!

  3. The Water Bearer January 19, 2013 at 9:12 pm #

    I really like these ideas. We don’t usually celebrate Valentine’s Day either, however these are ideas that I could really be willing to make an exception for. I do these types of things for my kids, but framing them as a gift has never crossed my mind. My Dad once gave me a picture frame with an inscription inside the glass. I still have it on my desk and it is the most treasured thing I have ever gotten. Why are the simple ways to show our love and respect so often overlooked and missed? Thank you I am going to pray for God to help me join in and do this for my Hubby. Blessings to you!

    • Kayla Gulick January 19, 2013 at 9:15 pm #

      Thank you for sharing!! I’m so glad you included how that frame from your Dad is still precious to you. Great affirmation for us that this will truly be a blessing! Enjoy your project : )

  4. learning1 January 20, 2013 at 10:22 pm #

    Love this idea! I’ve been needing to work on seeing and showing more respect and I am very inspired by this! I’ve been encouraged by you since I “met” you through peacefulwife with your post on “my demon” (which was so relatable!!). I’m so encouraged by your walk and your realness. 🙂 Thank you!

    • Kayla Gulick January 21, 2013 at 7:20 am #

      Thank you!!
      I hope we get the chance to actually meet some day, but if not here, then Heaven for sure!!

      Be sure to let me know what you end up doing and how it all worked out : ) Have fun!

      • learning1 July 10, 2013 at 11:24 pm #

        I know this is a long time now since your post, but I’ve felt the need to reply and let you know this went really well. I did this for his 35th birthday with 35 things. It was an eye-opener for me because I had to see just how little I consciously think respectful things (in other words – this took a bit of thought!) I wanted to say to my husband. I used some of peacefulwife’s wording from above too. I didn’t go with the subject theme, but rather pulled from all of our life. I typed it in pretty font and framed it for him and gave him a frame stand for it. It really meant a lot to him because he was particularly feeling down on himself at that time. He silently read it and thanked me a few times later (a few times is a big deal!). It also had an unexpected affect on me – better thinking. Now, I can honestly look back on that framed list and help pull myself out of rotten thinking toward him. This was a tremendous suggestion and I love how it worked out for us. Thank you!!!

      • Kayla Gulick July 11, 2013 at 7:16 am #

        I’m so glad you shared that!!!!! THANK YOU!!!!!

        I too, have went back to read the framed list hanging in our room when I need to remind myself. It truly has been a gift to both of us 🙂

  5. howsyourlovelife January 21, 2013 at 10:58 am #

    What a great idea! I love the thought of doing this for my 15 year old son, as well!

    • Kayla Gulick January 21, 2013 at 11:01 am #

      YES YES!! A gift your son will cherish!!!!!


  1. God does not call us to empty respect. « Lessons Of Mercy - January 25, 2013

    […] Once you have your one thing (or more) ACT on your respect!!!  TELL HIM! Maybe you’ll take the Valentines Challenge I posted here. […]

  2. My present is complete! « Lessons Of Mercy - February 4, 2013

    […] How are you coming on your Valentine’s Challenge? […]

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    […] year, I offered up this challenge for wives, not necessarily to be “a Valentine’s gift” but because it is never […]

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