A Bullet.

8 Jan

Wow — have your kids ever said something so simple and yet it resounds in your mind as the most profound thing you’ve ever heard???

That happened to me today when I was making lunch.  My husband’s parents got my boys these really awesome Nerf guns for Christmas and my daughter brought one into the kitchen where I was standing.  She proclaimed in her ‘mean, manly voice’, “I’m gonna get you Mama.”

I cry out “No, no, don’t shoot me, we’re friends. You don’t want to hurt your friend.”

To which she replies, “Yes, I do.  If I put a bullet in you, then we’ll be friends forever.”

She’s three years old.  And on first look at that, the simple sentence alone isn’t an earth-shaking statement.  It’s almost humorous her little innocence in trying to come up with a way to make it sound “fun” to shoot me so I’ll play along with her more.

But I got to thinking, is that how friendship works?  I’ll put a bullet in you, and if you live, we’ll be friends for life?

Well, maybe.

I mean, we do hurt the ones we love the most, right?  It’s why family feuds are the longest lasting and most bitter fights of all time.  Because we know where to hit each other to make them bleed the worst, AND we love each other so much that the bullet actually penetrates and really hurts instead of just bouncing off.

The wounds we inflict on each other kill each other and ruin relationships. (We give life or death with our words like the Bible speaks of when describing the power of the tongue.)

But those relationships that experience forgiveness for wounds and are brought back to life again through the revival of mercy and grace – those relationships mean the absolute most to us in the long run.

When I think of my husband, the reason I love him so much is because I know I’ve really hurt him.  I know I haven’t always been a good wife, or even a decent wife and I know that I’ve said hurtful things and threw punches verbally and spiritually below the belt a few times, and yet — he has extended forgiveness time and time again, with no long-standing consequences that he holds over my head.  When it’s over for him, it’s totally over.

How could he love me like that?  How could he forgive me like that?  How could he show mercy like that?  How could he be humble like that?

It cements my feelings for him to recall his patience, forgiveness, grace and love toward me.

He’s taken a bullet from me (more than once) – and instead of remaining dead, he chose life and forgave me.

And in my heart, that makes him my best friend for life.

Practical Application:

Spend some time thinking about your closest relationships?  Are they with people you have never, ever had a disagreement or issue with, EVER?  Or are they with people who you’ve had to disagree, argue, forgive, ask forgiveness, show grace and show mercy to?

How does that make you feel about those you haven’t chosen life with yet?  And what could that mean for your future with them?

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6 Responses to “A Bullet.”

  1. peacefulwife January 8, 2014 at 2:57 pm #

    Wow, Kayla! LOVE THIS! 🙂 Thank you for sharing the insights and gifts God gives you. They are so precious!!

    • Kayla Gulick January 8, 2014 at 3:00 pm #

      Thanks April! Sometimes these beautiful insights are actually loaded challenges for me 🙂

  2. Gleniece January 8, 2014 at 3:44 pm #

    I am so thankful for my forgiving husband. He had to dodge a lot of bullets in the past due to my selfish spirit. (Which I was totally unaware of, mind you). But God is good (and patient) and now we are both reaping the fruit of selfless love and forgiveness. Thanks, Kayla, for another thought-provoking post. Have a great day. 🙂

    • Kayla Gulick January 8, 2014 at 4:02 pm #

      “We are BOTH reaping the fruit” — I love that 🙂

  3. Elizabeth January 8, 2014 at 4:26 pm #

    Kayla,
    It seems that important insight came from “the mouth of babes.” How true this is! My mother-in-law and I had a “falling out” when she said something hurtful when I was taking care of her after knee-replacement surgery, and we both said hurtful things after that. It took several months to get past what happened and to restore our loving friendship, but I’m so glad we did. We CHOSE to forgive each other, and that’s the test of any close relationship. Until it’s tested, we don’t know if the other person loves or cares enough about us to forgive and love us, even with our faults. I love my friend/mother-in-law dearly, even more now that before this happened. Elizabeth

    • Kayla Gulick January 8, 2014 at 5:48 pm #

      What a beautiful testimony to this post. Thank you so much Elizabeth! I’m so glad you shared your story here.

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