Like New Condition

7 Apr

It’s been an odd couple of days.  I suppose odd is always good when it causes desire in me to dive into Scripture.  Sometimes I like it a lot when people say things that make me pull back and go “you know, I don’t think so.” Because it’s those moments when I grab my Bible and dig for truth, even if it’s just to affirm what I was sure I already knew.

I have a confession. I’m an addict amazon and Ebay shopper.  I would be horribly embarrassed to admit the amount of time I’ve spent on those two websites researching the best buys. (It’s in the hundreds of thousands I’m sure by this point in my life.) I’ll tell you what – I love finding items in like new condition for used prices! I live for a good bargain.

Today I sat here with my Bible and started weeping.  I could sell this current Bible with the status “Like New Condition.”  I was curious how old it was.  I looked in the front cover.  My husband and kids bought this for me December 25th, 2009.  This Bible is over 6 years old.

Now don’t get me wrong, it’s been used.  In fact, I’d say from 2009 – 2012 it was used absolutely daily, even multiple times per day.  Slightly less in 2013, much less in 2014, and virtually not at all in 2015.

It’s been open almost daily in 2016.  The words are flying off the page and some days it’s like reading my favorite story and other days it’s like I’ve never seen the words before.  I’m pretty certain I’ve read this specific Bible cover to cover 4 times, along with using it during Bible Studies I’ve done over the last six years.

I will say, I’m glad it is high quality and it didn’t fall apart in a year just from poor materials.  But those deep tears I was sobbing were not because the materials held up.  They were brokenness that the God who created me, who has forgiven me of pure evil an unfathomable amount of times, has blessed me countless ways, entrusted me with four amazing children, and held me through every single day of my Christian walk has not received even a fraction of that love back from me.  And it shows in the crisp pages of my Bible.

It’s wrote in, but I’d still call it clean.  It has wrinkled corners, but less than a few.  It has a couple of water marks (probably from coffee) but not even enough to call it stained.

Should I really be surprised that I’m not always acting like Christ? I couldn’t even begin to imagine the billions of calories I’ve consumed in 6 + years of food just to live, move and breath.  But God’s word is so clear, Man cannot live on bread alone but on EVERY WORD of the mouth of God. (Matthew 4:4)

My “like-new” Bible tells me I haven’t been living.  I’ve been surviving.  Living leads to witnessing, ministering and evangelizing for the sake of others. Surviving leads to tending to myself and my immediate needs so I don’t die.

I was dead last year. And by the grace of God, He revived me.  What more could I say than it was only for the purpose that I would now LIVE.  And the evidence of a life well LIVED will show when my Bible looks USED. Oh what a day that will be. Challenge accepted.

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4 Responses to “Like New Condition”

  1. Abby April 7, 2016 at 1:45 pm #

    I LOVE THIS! Thank you for sharing your heart Kayla!

    • Kayla Gulick April 7, 2016 at 1:49 pm #

      I’m glad you’re here Abby! But more than that, I’m so thankful for the God-given grace to be here, and challenged to be fully alive so I can share!!

  2. Elizabeth April 8, 2016 at 7:35 am #

    So true! I especially enjoyed your thoughts on surviving versus living, AND felt a pang of conviction, knowing how nice and clean I try to keep my Bible. There are, however, quite a few coffee spots. I love it that you see these truths so clearly now and are sharing your life with us. Thank you for being such a blessing!

    • Kayla Gulick April 8, 2016 at 7:49 am #

      Thank you so much for taking the time to comment!! You’ll never how how much it encourages me to know that God still finds me useful for His kingdom!

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